So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
I went to Spain to attend the Running of the Bulls, but when I arrived, there was nothing there but cows with fake horns attached.
I was in shambles.
How do you leave any building in Spain?
You "follow salida lida lida..."
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
What do you call a rental car in Spain?
A Barceloaner.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters?
The antichimera mechanism.
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel.
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
So I asked my Spanish friend if he knew where fish lived.
He said "Si."
If I were to wander around in Italy...
Would I be roamin'?
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
People are always amazed by the skilled tattoo artists in Spain
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
This is the first year I’m not going to Italy because of the coronavirus.
Normally I don’t go because I’m poor.
What do you call the generation of people that migrated from Italy?
Genitalia.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
After hearing about my history major, my dad said, “You should go visit Italy in late August.Then you can witness The Fall of Rome."
My local Italian restaurant is moving to Italy
They are moving to greener pasta.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
In Spain, you should not develop a program beyond 2.0.
Because that would be over dos.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
“Is this the Spanish word for ‘nap’?” She asked, pointing to a word on the page.
“Si, está.”
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
I guess I’m going to France
Because I have nothing Toulouse.
Brother: "My friend John is in Greece studying abroad."
My Dad: "What's her name?"
Which ancient Greek Philosopher had a foot fetish?
Play-toe.
Or was it Sock-rates?
Where to Bees go to party in Spain?
Ibiza.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite Spanish food?
Jamon!
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said "give me one of the Spanish bagels". He responded " One of the Spanish Bagels?"
"Ay poppy."
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
Go to BabaMail
