A soda can, a gas tank and the Greek god Eros walked into a bar?
The bartender shook his head, “Here comes trouble.” A patron at the bar said, “What’s wrong?” The bartender replied, “Those guys get together and they become cantankeros.”
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
I saw this beautiful tower in Italy..
It was a Pisa art!
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
If you want to vacation in Italy, don't be afraid to Rome around.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
My son asked me what Micheal Jackson was doing in Italy
I told him he was "sight-heeheeing."
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
How do cats say goodbye in Italy?
Miao.
What do you call the Greek God of Mexican chickens?
Apollo
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
I guess you can say my misunderstanding of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles
Elbow.
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
Why do people in Greece not wake up until noon?
Because Dawn is tough on greece.
What do you call a Greek love song?
An Aphro-ditty.
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
I asked my Italian grandfather if the rougher parts of Italy were called the spaghetto.
His look was pasty.
Did you know there was a Jedi from Italy who was really strict about diets?
His name was Only One Cannoli.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
What's the difference between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt?
Greek yogurt has a rich cultural history.
Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish?
His name is Juan O'Clock.
Half of Italy is complaining about the coronavirus and the other half is laughing not taking it seriously.
All they do is cheese and wine.
What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?
José and Hose-B.
This is the first year I’m not going to Italy because of the coronavirus.
Normally I don’t go because I’m poor.
Who holds sermons during Sunday in Italy?
The Pasta.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
The Greeks make the best cheese
You feta believe it!
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
What is the capital of Greece?
G.
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
What do cows in Greece sound like?
They say µ.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
Genoa bout the bridge collapse in Italy?
Ah well, we won't go over it then.
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
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