I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
How do you come up with a secure password to protect yourself against hackers?
Just make it the last 10 digits of pi.
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
I can relate to my computer so much. Even I go to sleep after 25mins of inactivity.
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
My father said that there was a bug on my computer. The bug was trying to eat one byte at a time.
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
Where are dramatic hard drives from?
Oh I/O
Why do cats like computers the best?
Cuz they have a mouse.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
I couldn't stop laughing when my father warned my brother, saying, "If you hack my Microsoft Office, I will find you, you have my Word".
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
Changed all my passwords to Kenny.
Now all I have are Kenny Loggins.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
Does your computer constantly and annoyingly have tons of updates to install?
Of course it does. Software needs to get better over a number of years and you can't rush the progress.
Chrome wasn't built in a day.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
This time last year I was working as a computer programmer, installing auto correct. But out of nowhere..
.. I was fried for no raisin.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
My computer was running pretty hot
Until I downloaded some fan art, and now it's working better.
I used to store motivational quotes that I found online, onto the cloud, for whenever I needed some inspiration.
Unfortunately I forgot the password for my Google account.
I have no Drive.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
Apparently Dracula sets up a password for every website so he can click on Your Account.
A robot is eating a hard drive for lunch.
The robot's friend asks for a bite and the robot says "Sure, but just a small bite." His friend takes a bite and the robot shouts, "Hey! That's a megabyte!"
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
Why did the computer crash?
It had a bad driver!
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
Q. Where do computers keep their money?
A. In a data bank.
Computers can be very good at golf because of their hard drives.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
The FBI are raiding an alleged spy's apartment when they discover a hard drive labeled "KGB".
One of the agents holds it up with a look of confusion and says, "Why wouldn't he just write 1 TB?"
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
Why was the IT guy in the hospital?
He touched the firewall.
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
The computer wanted to get out of the house, so it used the Windows.
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
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