What is the favorite snack of a programmer, it's undoubtedly Cadbury bytes.
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
I was conned into believing that my hotel room in Moscow had free Wifi.
I remember the ad saying: Internyet.
The FBI are raiding an alleged spy's apartment when they discover a hard drive labeled "KGB".
One of the agents holds it up with a look of confusion and says, "Why wouldn't he just write 1 TB?"
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I know when I store files, my computer gets hungry. It starts telling me about the bytes I use and how many are remaining for him to fill up completely.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
Why did the computer leave the restroom crying?
It said, "it hurts when IP."
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I am really good with PowerPoint because I Excel at it.
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
Q. Where do computers keep their money?
A. In a data bank.
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
A robot is eating a hard drive for lunch.
The robot's friend asks for a bite and the robot says "Sure, but just a small bite." His friend takes a bite and the robot shouts, "Hey! That's a megabyte!"
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
A router and a modem got married.
They were pronounced husbandwidth and Wifi.
Which hard drive is always the happiest?
Disk C:
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
Some guy asked dad for the WiFi code.
Shrugging his shoulders and giving a sympathetic look, he responded: I can't figure her out either.
What did the eyewitness tell the cops after a computer robbed a bank?
It went data way!
*Creating password*
"MTWTFSS_MTWTFSS"
ERROR: [Password two week]
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
Why was the computer coughing?
It had a virus.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
Trying to teach my dad how to put WiFi on his tablet
Me: You just have to go to settings!
Dad: This is just making me upsettings!
On the spot no hesitation! Gotta love him!
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
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