Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
Did you see the guy with quad-arms play tennis? He has a great four-hand.
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
Which LA King was the total package? Parcel Dionne.
Do baseball players ever wear armor?
Only during knight games.
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
Football is one habit I will never kick
The guy missed both his serves on match point. I won by de-fault.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
Why did the hotdogger quit skiing at MaryJane?
Because it was the wurst stunt skier at Winter Park Resort.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
Birds too love cheering on their soccer teams. They egg them on.
Why don't matches play baseball?
Because one strike, and they're out.
What do you do if a running back swallows the football?
You have to get him to cough it up!
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
If you doubt whether bowling is a sport, get it from me, that yes, it is a sport, but for people who have talent to spare.
What do we call the basketball team that won the donuts championships? – dunkin donuts.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
We like rough sets. As long as you practice safe sets, there isn’t a problem.
If you do bowling and for some reason you can’t hear a pin drop, something could be wrong with your bowling.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship.
Did Cyclops the X-man play hockey? Yes, he enjoyed lasing up the skates.
What is a golfer’s favorite bird?
Any birdie will do.
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
Did you hear the joke about the pop fly? Oh, nevermind. It was over your head...
How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?
FORE!
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I bet this chair lift weighs enough to break the ice.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
Why did the kid pursue scuba diving?
Because all his grades are below C-level.
The game of golf is 90-percent mental…
And 10-percent mental.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
When I got my first job at the bowling alley, I was only tenpin.
Do you believe this? All soccer players, irrespective of their country of origin, have one goal.
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
Federer is such a legend that they named the Roger’s Cup, and Fed Cup after him.
. What do you call it when you heard the same jogger pun earlier, yet laughed again?
A running joke.
How did the serve know when the bad serve was not with the hand? The server knew it was the foot fault.
The main difference between a dog and a basketball player is that one dribbles while the other one drools.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
I’m never board when I’m at the pool.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
Did you hear the terrible rumor about the volleyball player? That’s what she set!
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