Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
Why do cats like computers the best?
Cuz they have a mouse.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
My keyboard is missing a key. I lost ctrl.
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
Free Wifi!
Why? Was Mr. Wifi wrongfully accused or something?
Why didn't the cell phone wear his glasses? He lost his contacts.
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
Why was the hard drive scared of the large file?
Because it was a terror-byte.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
What happens when you cross an iron with a telephone? You get a smooth signal.
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
The rancher's Wifi wasn't working so he moved the router to the barn...
Now he has a stable connection
What did the WiFi router say when it was unplugged?
"Tell my wifi love her
Why can't you use beef stew as a password?
Because it's not stroganoff.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
What did the baby computer call its father?
Data.
What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson?
A gap in coverage.
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
What was Hitler's favorite computer game?
Mein Kraft.
The FBI are raiding an alleged spy's apartment when they discover a hard drive labeled "KGB".
One of the agents holds it up with a look of confusion and says, "Why wouldn't he just write 1 TB?"
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
Are you WiFi?
Because I can feel the connection between us.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
If cheese were downloadable, then I'd try to throw my hard drive as far as possible.
What I'm saying is, I'd chuck e-cheese.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Why did the computer leave the restroom crying?
It said, "it hurts when IP."
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
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