Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
A friend of mine has a mobile phone shaped like an Italian dumpling. It's a gnocchia.
The computer wanted to get out of the house, so it used the Windows.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
I imagine eventually there will be a day when we have a WiFi hotspot on Mt. Everest.
Only then will we reach peak internet.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
What happens if you cross a night crawler with a telephone? You get Ringworm!
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
My brother, who is an IT guy, got surgery done on his fingers. Now he can truly be called a tech-knuckle support guy.
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were Prime mates!
I dropped my computer on my foot.
It mega-hurts.
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
How come the mummy doesn't want a telephone? Because he always gets too wrapped up on his calls.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
What happens when you cross a cell phone with a skunk?
You get stinky service!
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
What's the tastiest part of a floppy disk?
The cookie!
What did the WiFi router say when it was unplugged?
"Tell my wifi love her
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
My husband asked me to sync his phone. So I threw it in the sea - not sure why he is upset.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
Why can't you use beef stew as a password?
Because it's not stroganoff.
4G, or not 4G, that is the question.
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
What do a phone and an engaged girl have in common? They both have rings.
I told my boss, "Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues."
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
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