Why can't an IT guy keep a girlfriend?
He turns them all off and on again.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Did you hear about the Wi-Fi wedding?
The ceremony was awful, but the reception was great!
This time last year I was working as a computer programmer, installing auto correct. But out of nowhere..
.. I was fried for no raisin.
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
What do Russians call a bad WiFi connection?
Inter-NIET
What do cell phones order at dinner?
Apps.
One day, I carried my laptop to the zoo because I wanted a RAM upgrade so I would have lots of memory when I came back.
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
Do you know the band 1023 megabytes?
They haven't had a gig yet.
My cell phone got drunk.
It took too many screenshots.
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
I got a new cell phone for my wife...
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
A router and a modem got married.
They were pronounced husbandwidth and Wifi.
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
My husband asked me to sync his phone. So I threw it in the sea - not sure why he is upset.
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
What brand of hand soap do telephone operators use? Dial.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
Why was the old computer sad?
Because it had a floppy disk.
How come an owl turns his cell phone off at night? So he doesn't get any hooty calls.
Why are wooden hard drives so bad?
They're all bark and no byte.
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
I did it! Dad said to save my money til my balance looks like a phone number.....
Available balance: $9.11.
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
Cell phones are a static symbol.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
My dog ate my computer science homework.
It took him a couple of bytes.
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
Go to BabaMail
