Speed and Velocity are brothers.
Velocity has a family, is rich and teaches classes around the world.
Speed dropped out and still lives with his parents.
They think Speed lacks Direction.
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.
It replied, “No, thanks, I am traveling light.”
Why do physics professors prefer overweight students?
They have greater potential.
My physics professor told me I had potential
Then he pushed me off the roof.
Some people think nuclear physics is interesting.
Well, in my opinion it's really Bohring.
At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, “What happened before The Big Bang?”
He said, “Sorry. There is no time.”
What is better than a physics joke?
A meta physics joke.
When you offered me love, I lepton it!
I've been trying to think of an electrical pun but now my head Hertz.
A physics student ask his teacher: "Can you point me to someone who can teach me a way in which quantum mechanics can be united with general relativity?"
The teacher answers: "Let me see if I can pull some strings for you."
What did the nuclear physicist have for lunch?
Fission Chips.
My physics teacher asked, “So why is v-naught 0?”
I replied, “y-naught?”
So engineering school is really hard.
I'm not doing so hot in thermodynamics.
Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research?
Did you hear about the neutron who was arrested?
He was released without charge.
Physics is like incest.
It’s all relative.
We had a lively debate in physics.
It was a conversation of energy.
What is a vector’s favorite band? One Direction!
I got a C in Physics and my parents grounded me.
They say I don't understand the gravity of the situation.
What did the nerdy duckling say ?
Quark Quark.
My Physics teacher said I have no potential.
Joke's on her, I just bought a ladder.
The local band stand was struck by lightening yesterday while the band was playing.
Only the conductor was hit.
I really liked learning about displacement in Physics.
It's pretty straight to the point.
May the mass times acceleration be with you.
I keep asking my physics teacher "what is the unit for power?"
But he just saying "Yes."
The frequency of bad physics puns on this category...
It hertz.
Physics puns are no joke. It’s a relatively dark matter.
When I was in school I got a B in biology, a C in chemistry.
And an F in Physics.
Two sodium atoms are walking down the street. Suddenly one says “Oh, my God, I’ve lost an electron!” The other says “Lost an electron! Are you sure?” and the first replies “Yes, I’m positive!”
Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time too.
My physics teacher told me i had so much potential, so much energy.
Then I fell down the stairs and lost it all.
What do you call a glass robot that is good at physics?
A new-clear physicist.
Why can you tell that Theresa May failed physics?
She had power and time but didn't get the work done.
Physics student asks to go to bathroom.
Professor asks "Liquid, Solid or Gas?"
I sit in front if my ex in physics.
There used to be a lot of friction between us.
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
I love Physics, but I'm terrible at Math.
I hope in doesn't Matter.
A physics teacher is about to jump off a high bridge
When a friend stops him saying, "Don't do it, you have so much potential."
Are electrons pessimistic or optimistic?
Obviously pessimistic, they are always negative!
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade; when life gives you apples, make physics equations.
(Looking at you Newton).
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