Although knights were considered protectors of the realm, they sometimes did get involved in the politics of their time. This was because the knights followed knight-wing politics.
Why does England always get attacked in the summer?
Because the Knights are shorter then.
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
What was that knight's name who would always go around and call other knights by their last names? Sir Name.
How can you tell a sword is a knights favorite weapon?
He doesn't use a lance a lot.
Why was the medieval architect always going to the beaches? So that he could build the perfect sandcastle!
The medieval ages were technologically advanced. Take, for example, the guillotine, it was such cutting-edge technology.
The medieval king was very excited when the engineer told him that he could get him a castle at very little price. Turns out, the engineer indeed built a castle but it was a bouncy one.
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
What do you call a knight who just wants to fight with an opponent on level grounds? He is called Sir Face!
Who was the knight that was very secretive?
Sir Reptitious
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? Canned food.
If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
A great knight became all discombobulated and lost his weapons...
He was all out of swords.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
Why did Henry VIII struggle to breathe?
He had no heir!
What do you name a knight who has been able to persevere through all the barriers in his way? A Sir Vivor!
Most of the knights of the round table of King Arthur were in their middle ages.
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
What is a knight who has traveled all across the earth with a ship known as? He is known as Sir Cumnavigator.
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
Which one of King Arthur's knights named the Round Table?
Sir Cumference
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
No one could measure their height in medieval kingdoms.
Only the Ruler could.
What should be the name of the knight who the King has appointed to carry a census of the land? He goes by the name Sir Vey.
What do you call a medieval siege machine that throws flowers?
A trebouquet
In the dark ages, the knights had to attend a special type of school. It was the Knight School.
Medieval Kings and Queens were carried by their soldiers and servants. I am not lying, they litter-ally carried that way!
Did you know knights are known for wearing dishware?
Thats why they call it plate armor.
What type of weapon does a vegetable knight use?
A-spear-iguess
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
Why was the king only a foot tall?
Because he was a ruler.
What do you call a drunk medieval poet?
Shakesbeer
In medieval times, what were people who worked in banks known as? They were known as fortune-tellers!
What do you call a knight that jousts all the time
Sir Lance-alot
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
The castle and court of Camelot were famous for their knight-life.
What do you call Sir Lancelot when he is dancing and singing to his heart's content at a party? We call him Sir Dancelot.
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
I went to a dad-joke competition at Medieval Times last weekend..
They called it the Game of Groans.
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
Which English royal family was the smartest?
The Tudors.
How did murderers hide the body in medieval times?
They start by dragon it.
What was written on a knight's headstone?
Rust in peace.
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