Why didn’t the Romans find algebra very challenging?
Because they always knew X was 10.
Where do you bury dead people? Asymmetry
Why didn’t Bob drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?
It was too cubed.
What’s the best way to woo a math teacher?
Use acute angle.
Why do plants hate math?
Because it gives them square roots.
Did you hear the one about the statistician.
Probably.
Why did the chicken cross the Mobius Strip?
To get to the same side.
Why does nobody talk to circles?
Because there is no point!
Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?
They already 8!
Why should you never mention the number 288?
Because it’s two gross.
What did the math teach rate the movie American Pie?
3.14
Who invented the Round Table?
Sir Cumference.
What’s the best place to do math homework?
On a multiplication table.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th.
How do you do math in your head?
Just use imaginary numbers.
Why shouldn’t you let advanced math intimidate you?
It’s really as easy as pi!
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
Why do math teachers love parks so much?
Because of all the natural logs.
Where do mathematicians like to party?
In bar graphs.
Why should you worry about the math teacher holding graph paper?
She’s definitely plotting something.
Are monsters good at math?
Not unless you Count Dracula.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine!
What do you call a number that can’t keep still?
A roamin’ numeral.
Why do teenagers travel in groups of 3 or 5?
Because they can’t even.
You know what’s odd?
Every other number.
Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?
His parents wouldn’t Cosine.
Did you hear about the mathematician whose afraid of negative numbers?
He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
How come old math teachers never die?
They tend to just lose some of their functions.
What did the student say when the witch doctor removed his curse?
Hexagon.
Why is it sad that parallel lines have so much in common?
Because they’ll never meet.
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
How do you stay warm in any room?
Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.
Why should you never argue with decimals?
Decimals always have a point.
Did you hear about the statistician who drowned crossing the river?
It was three feet deep on average.
Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?
Because it was over 90 degrees.
A farmer counted 297 cows in the field.
But when he rounded them up, he had 300.
What happens when you hire an odd-job guy to do 8 jobs?
They only do 1, 3, 5 and 7.
What do you call dudes who love math?
Algebros.
Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average?
It was a ‘mean’ thing to say!
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can’t drink and derive…
What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?
"He didn't count on this."
An opinion without 3.14159 is just an onion.
Why DID seven eat nine?
Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day!
Why does algebra make you a better dancer?
Because you can use algo-rhythm.
Why didn’t sin and tan go to the party?
Just cos.
Dear Algebra, Please stop asking us to find your X.
She’s never coming back—don’t ask Y.
What kind of snake does your math teacher probably own?
A pi-thon.
To the person who invented zero...
Thanks for nothing.
My girlfriend is the square root of -100.
She’s a perfect 10, but purely imaginary.
hy don’t calculus major throw house parties?
Because they know firsthand that it’s a bad idea to drive and derive.
How do you make seven an even number?
Just remove the “s.”
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