Why didn’t the Romans find algebra very challenging?
Because they always knew X was 10.
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can’t drink and derive…
Did you hear about the mathematician whose afraid of negative numbers?
He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
How come old math teachers never die?
They tend to just lose some of their functions.
Why do math teachers love parks so much?
Because of all the natural logs.
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second one orders half a beer. The third one orders a fourth of a beer. The bartender stops them, pours two beers and says, “You guys should know your limits.”
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
My girlfriend is the square root of -100.
She’s a perfect 10, but purely imaginary.
Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?
His parents wouldn’t Cosine.
What do you call an angle that is adorable?
Acute angle.
Why should you never mention the number 288?
Because it’s two gross.
What do you call a number that can’t keep still?
A roamin’ numeral.
A farmer counted 297 cows in the field.
But when he rounded them up, he had 300.
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
Are monsters good at math?
Not unless you Count Dracula.
How do you do math in your head?
Just use imaginary numbers.
What happens when you hire an odd-job guy to do 8 jobs?
They only do 1, 3, 5 and 7.
Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?
Because it was over 90 degrees.
Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average?
It was a ‘mean’ thing to say!
hy don’t calculus major throw house parties?
Because they know firsthand that it’s a bad idea to drive and derive.
What kind of snake does your math teacher probably own?
A pi-thon.
How do you stay warm in any room?
Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.
Why shouldn’t you let advanced math intimidate you?
It’s really as easy as pi!
Why didn’t Bob drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?
It was too cubed.
Where do mathematicians like to party?
In bar graphs.
Who invented the Round Table?
Sir Cumference.
Why was the math lecture so long?
The professor kept going off on a tangent.
Never trust math teachers who use graph paper.
They're *always* plotting something.
Why should you worry about the math teacher holding graph paper?
She’s definitely plotting something.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine!
What’s the best way to woo a math teacher?
Use acute angle.
Did you hear the one about the statistician.
Probably.
Why should you never argue with decimals?
Decimals always have a point.
What do you call dudes who love math?
Algebros.
You know what’s odd?
Every other number.
Why are obtuse angles so depressed?
Because they’re never right.
What did the math teach rate the movie American Pie?
3.14
Why did the chicken cross the Mobius Strip?
To get to the same side.
Why is it sad that parallel lines have so much in common?
Because they’ll never meet.
Did you hear about the statistician who drowned crossing the river?
It was three feet deep on average.
What did the numerator say to the denominator when they broke up?
I'm so over you!
Why didn’t sin and tan go to the party?
Just cos.
To the person who invented zero...
Thanks for nothing.
Why does algebra make you a better dancer?
Because you can use algo-rhythm.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th.
Why did the hipster throw away his calculus book?
He found it too derivative.
Why does nobody talk to circles?
Because there is no point!
Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?
They already 8!
What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?
"He didn't count on this."
An opinion without 3.14159 is just an onion.
Why are math books so darn depressing?
They’re literally filled with problems.
Go to BabaMail
