What do you call a musician who just saw Medusa?
A rockstar!
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
4 Norse gods, 1 roman God, and 2 astrological bodies walk into a bar
The bartender says: Oh, this is gonna be a week joke
The medieval ages were technologically advanced. Take, for example, the guillotine, it was such cutting-edge technology.
King Arthur had a knight in charge of determining property boundaries.
Sir Veyor
What did the gangster say to Julius Cesar?
When Lincoln had asked Republican Senator John if he would aid him in capturing Atlanta, he replied, "Sher-man!"
I always knew that some knights had names that described their personality (like Lancelot the Brave), but I didn't realise nuns did that too until I became one...
I was Nun the Wiser.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
What type of weapon does a vegetable knight use?
A-spear-iguess
If you go to Medieval Times and watch the jousts, there is a sir charge.
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
One of the funny puns uttered by Mark Twain is that denial is not just a river in Egypt.
How did knights in the middle-ages get across a moat?
Moataboat
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
They both lived in colonies!
I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 or 500 in Roman numerals.
I M L I VI D
Medieval castles would have been great hangout spots in modern times because they had a great knight life!
The Second World War was very slow because they were Stalin.
Who said that the pyramids are the tallest structure in Egypt? They are just between pyra-highs and pyra-lows.
What do you yell at two mummies making out in public?
Get a tomb!
Medieval scientists were known to be very arrogant and stubborn. They thought that everything revolved around them!
Did Roman architecture emphasize forum over function?
What is a knight who has traveled all across the earth with a ship known as? He is known as Sir Cumnavigator.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
Once upon a time, there was a king who loved traveling through tunnels. The people gave him the name: Alex-Under."
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
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