Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal sized clippers?
Shear size.
Someone put LSD in my hair gel
My hair has been spiked.
My daughter asked me if I could put her hair in a bun. I said...
“I could but I think the baker might object”.
When my great-grandad went bald, he built a machine to weave himself a wig out of yarn. He then gave it to my grandad, who then gave it to my dad - and one day, it will be mine.
It’s our family hair loom.
Why doesn't the moon shave?
Because it waxes.
Huge explosion at the hair brush factory...
Investigators are still combing through the wreckage.
What did the wig say to the head?
I got you covered.
What do you call a line of men out on the lawn, having sausages and waiting to have a haircut and shave?
A barber queue.
I recently had my hair cut.
At first I didn’t like it but now it’s growing on me.
What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
Shamboo.
What's a bee's favorite hairstyle?
A buzz cut.
What does Satan shave with?
A hell razor.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Coworker: Hey, I reallly like your hair! What's your secret?
Me: Thank-you! I don't get very many complements on it. Most people are gel-ous.
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?
Because he conditions it.
I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
My hair was acting crazy so I told it to comb down.
Did you guys see the cow with facial hair?
It has a moo-stache.
What hairstyle did Moses get at the hairdressers?
A middle parting.
I mustache you a question..
but I'll shave it for later.
My executive assistant has long hair.
I call him my mane man.
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