I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
What’s the capital of France?
The F.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
How do you Charlemange-age to get through the last few days before vacation?
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
I’m in love with France, and I ain’t Lyon.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
French people give me the crepes.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
Did you hear about the Frenchman who jumped into the river in Paris?
He was declared to be in Seine.
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
Can I be Candide with you?
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
I’ll try to keep it brief, but I have so much to Marseilles about France.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
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