What happens if an elf catches you being naughty?
Yule be sorry!
Knock knock
Who's there?
Elf
Elf who?
Elf me wrap this present!
What type of elf has the most books?
A bookshelf.
What goes inside elves’ pointy shoes?
Their mistletoes.
"Santa’s pretty stelfy going down the chimney, don’t you think?" said one elf to another.
What do elves learn when they go to school?
The elf-abet.
Why shouldn't you feed elves shellfish?
It makes them crabby!
Whose music do elves like the most?
Elf-is Presley.
What do they call a wild elf in Texas?
Gnome on the range!
Why did some of the elves spell Christmas as N-O-E? Because Santa said No L!
Did you hear about the Elf booted from the chorus?
He couldn't Fa-la-la-la-long.
Elves usually make fantastic listeners since they happen to be all ears.
What kind of elf lives in a soda can?
A Sprite!
What happens to elves who misbehave?
They get the sack.
Why did Santa stop smoking a pipe?
It was bad for his elf!
What lives at the North Pole and is green, white, and red all over?
A sunburned elf!
Why did the dyslexic elf get fired?
He kept writing "From Satan" on children's New Year presents.
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
"Don’t be elfish," said momma elf to her son. "Share with your sister."
When the elves are clapping for their boss, we call it Santapplause.
Why did the elf use a duck to wake him on Christmas morning?
So he could be up at the quack of dawn!
What kind of bread do elves use to make sandwiches?
Why shortbread of course!
Did you hear about the elf that quit Santa's workshop?
He was a rebel without a Claus.
What kind of money do elves use?
Cold cash!
How many elves does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten! One to change the light bulb and nine to stand on each other's shoulders!
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