My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
Why was the computer coughing?
It had a virus.
Trying to teach my dad how to put WiFi on his tablet
Me: You just have to go to settings!
Dad: This is just making me upsettings!
On the spot no hesitation! Gotta love him!
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
If cheese were downloadable, then I'd try to throw my hard drive as far as possible.
What I'm saying is, I'd chuck e-cheese.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
Why was the hard drive scared of the large file?
Because it was a terror-byte.
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
Why was the computer sad?
It was going un-node-iced.
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
Why do computers wear glasses?
To improve their web-sight.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
Some guy asked dad for the WiFi code.
Shrugging his shoulders and giving a sympathetic look, he responded: I can't figure her out either.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
I felt sad for my brother's computer being overclocked because I heard the processor say, "Stop it! It hertz so much!".
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
I imagine eventually there will be a day when we have a WiFi hotspot on Mt. Everest.
Only then will we reach peak internet.
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
Where do all the cool mice live? In their mousepads.
Are you WiFi?
Because I can feel the connection between us.
Go to BabaMail
