Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
Why is it bad to tell mole jokes?
It's mole-itically incorrect.
What did the generous mole say when people crashed his party?
The mole the merrier
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
How would you describe a stinky chemist?
Mole-odorous
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"
The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
What do you call an acid with attitude?
A meano-acid.
What kind of test do chemistry students like best?
Mole-tiple choice
Wanna hear a pun about gold? AU!
An electrolyte and a solvent are talking in jail.
Solvent: What are you in for?
Electrolyte: A salt charge.
Ah! The element of surprise.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
Books on helium are so hard to put down.
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
If Iron Man and the Silver Surfer teamed up together, would they be alloys?
How rich is Avogadro?
He's a multi-mole-ionaire.
What did one mole say to the other?
We have great chemistry together.
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.
What do you get when you have a bunch of moles acting like idiots?
A bunch of mole-asses
A chemistry lab is like a big party.
Some drop the acid while others drop the base.
You know what's cool about chemistry?
Endothermic reactions.
What are mammoles?
Four-legged ani-moles
Funny chemistry puns always get a good reaction.
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.
I'm fascinated by water's gas form.
It mist-ifies me.
Why couldn't the alpha helix say the alphabet?
Because it broke up every time it got to L-amino P.
Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.
I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases here."
Helium doesn't react.
What do doctors do to injured elements? They helium.
How do you make a hormone? You don't pay her.
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
Organic chemistry is really hard.
Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
I keep making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
Which tooth did Avogadro have pulled?
One of his mole-ars
What do you do with a sick chemist? You try to helium, and then you try to curium, but if all else fails, you gotta barium.
What do you call a cab which provides drug therapy? Chemotaxis.
What does Avogadro put in his hot chocolate?
Marsh-mole-ows
Why does Avogadro like Cindy Crawford?
She's his favorite super-mole-dle (and she has a mole).
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
"HeHe."
Did you check the news? There was a Radon the chemical store.
An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?"
"Sure. That's easy," said one man.
"What is it?"
"H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O."
"What, what?" reasked the instructor.
"H to O," explained the chemistry expert.
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?
Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
Why don't they galvanize ships?
Because that would make them zinc.
Go to BabaMail
