My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
How do you know your dehydrated? You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? "I like your style."
What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped in his toe? Mitosis.
What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexics Association.
Do you find bone puns humerus?
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you won’t be headed to the ICU.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.
Hey why Are The Viruses All Gone? Cause They "flu" AWAY.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
Did you guys hear about that 14-year old virgin girl who got pregnant after receiving the flu vaccine?
Sounds like an inoculate conception.
Bacteria is the only culture some people have.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
Working on lab science animals is a real rat race.
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
What is the reproductive area in South America? Spermatagonia.
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
Two red blood cells met and fell in love, but alas, it was all in vein.
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?
Take their genes down.
Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
What does a biologist wear when they're going out?
Designer genes.
Organ donors really put their heart into it.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon? He caught the garter snake.
What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel?
That's a moray!
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
What did the Endoplasmic Reticulum say to the Golgi. I like your body, and the Golgi said it's complex.
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