Why did the artist cross the street? To crosshatch to the other side.
If a purple-colored fruit gets stuck in your drain, then you should call a plum-ber to fix it.
If you don't focus on learning your lines for the production, I shutter to imagine what the reviewers will snap about.
I went to a new kind of show yesterday, which was hosted by a color-changing lizard. He was a good stand-up chameleon.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
The favorite colors of fishes are deep blue and aquamarine blue.
My least favourite hue is purple. It's worse than red and blue combined.
Why was the painter upset when his doctor bought all of his paintings? The doctor thought the paintings would go up in value after his death.
What do you call an artist without a palette? Someone who makes paintings without taste.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre?
A: They apparently went to see "Closed For The Winter"
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
An actor I know fell through the floor recently. It's just a stage he was going through.
Julius Caesar ordered pizza for the senate at Theatre of Pompey
Casca: How could you not order enough pizza for everyone?
Julius: But there was enough for everybody to have a slice...
Brutus: I ate 2 slices.
Julius: ATE TWO, BRUTE?
What does an artist call his sketch pad? A house.
I keep looking at our upstage platform that is designed with only a ladder for access. It's just so hard not to stair.
Why did the artist get into a heated argument with the gallery curator? He just wasn't in the right frame of mind.
If art became imprisoned we'd have to Freda art.
Why are artists so temperamental? They have to get into the right frame of mind.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
Librarians don't like drinking white wine. They prefer the well red ones!
I red a joke about colors once.
It blue my mind.
What do you call a crimson-colored fish wearing a hat?
A red herring...
Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
Car Salesman: And if you don't like this color, we have another one in "Boulder Gray"
Me: Gray isn't very bold to begin with, how did you make it bolder?
The color turquoise was judged as the best new color because it was cyantifically proven to be.
After checking my poor results, the art teacher shouted, "Never in a vermilion years have I seen such poor grades"!
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
An actor arrived for his rehearsal at the theatre.
As he looked around, an incredible feeling of deja vu swept over him.
Suddenly he realised the set seemed like a weird adaption of his apartment, the actress looked like an odd version of his wife, and the director sounded like an eerie rendition of his dad.
"Uncanny!" He thought. "I've arrived at a strange stage of my life".
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
What did the artist tell his greatest nemesis? I challenge you to a doodle!
Never date a Theater person...
... wayyy too much Drama...
Whenever my wife is upset I let her color in my black and white tattoos
She just really needed a shoulder to crayon
Dark-colored huskies found in Colorado can also be termed as dusky huskies!
My friend can't afford expensive art, she has no Monet.
A prankster played a really dark and dim-witted joke at the theatre. He turned off the lights.
Colors laugh by saying, "Hue Hue Hue."
What song does a painter sing when he is in truly dire straits? Monet for Nothing.
Though my brother won the art competition, he went up to his rival and gave him the credit where it was hue!
Why did the bald man decide to paint a bunch of rabbits on his head? He thought that they could look like hares from a distance.
Why does everyone paint Easter Eggs? Because it is a lot easier than wallpapering them.
Who else is a famous barnyard painter?
Pablo PIGcaso
Q. Which African animal is the oldest?
A. The zebra. 'Cause it's in black and white.
Where does a cow hang his best paintings? In a moo-seum, of course.
TV news anchors love the shades of red. They get serious whenever there is Burgundy.
When the well-read bird decided to open a restaurant, he named it Red Robin.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
Why did the artist go to the lounge? Because it was her comfort tone.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
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