I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!”
What did Communists use to light their houses before candles? Electricity.
My Co-Worker came in today exhausted from staying up all night watching Television comedies...
She Satired.
What do you call a worm that chews up power cords? An electro-maggot.”
My friend bought a new house, and invited everyone to a party.
My dad asks, "How was the house warming?" And I said, "With the furnace, I suppose."
What do you call a slice of bread you put in the toaster?
A tanning bread.
Why was the broken air conditioner already sad?
Because it couldn’t vent it’s problems.
Last night me and the wife watched three DVDs back to back.
Luckily I was the one facing the TV
Invest in grills!
They're hot steakholders!
How did the electrician pay for his new phone?
He charged it.
Television is a medium,
Because anything well done is rare.
Why did the man eat the light bulb? He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.”
Did you hear about the abusive flashlight? It was charged with battery.
What did the lamp say to the flickering candle?
"Do you want to go out sometime soon?"
I put some bread in the toaster this morning, but it never popped up again
I think it might be comatoast.
Just burned 2,000 calories.
That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
How did the charger get rich?
He made a killing in the shock market.
Why do quitters do all the laundry?
They always throw in the towel!
Two TV antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married...
The ceremony was boring but the reception was brilliant.
Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..
It came with no attachments.
A policeman was busted for collecting bribes and hiding the money in his freezer....
When the authorities searched his freezer, they found nothing but cold hard cash
I once knew a priest that only ate microwave soup.
He was a Ramen Catholic.
What veggie should you avoid buying if your fridge is tiny?
Fungi. They take up too mushroom.
Why did the electrical cords break up?
There was no spark between them.
What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster?
"I'M BREADY TO DIE"
What was the light bulb’s occupation?
He was a conductor
I went to shop for a toaster. The sailsman showed me all the fancy features.
I said "wow, that's cool!"
And he replied, "Sorry ma'am,it can only warm"
My wife left a note on the fridge, saying, "This isn't working. Goodbye."
I opened it and it works fine.
What did the man say after he came out of the walk-in freezer?
"That experience was chilling."
Whoever named it a television ...
Should've called it a watching machine.
My brother just admitted that he broke my favourite lamp.
I'm not sure I'll be able look at him in the same light ever again
I was holding a bottle of laundry detergent when all of a sudden it exploded, completely drenching my hands.
Oh well. I guess my hands are Tide.
I keep scores of my favorite iceboxes.
They're my refrigeRATINGS.
Even the heaviest chandelier is pretty light.
Why are the electricians always up to date? Because they are ‘current specialists.
My wife asked me why I was ironing my 4 leaf clover.
I told her I was pressing my luck
Why does a microwave hum?
Because it doesn't know the words
I bring my TV remote into every sports bar I go to so I can change the channel to whatever I want.
It’s a real game changer
I just found out you should never put a bar of soap in the dishwasher.
It's hand wash only.
What did the black pepper say to his wife after coming out of the grinder?
"Don't worry. I'm fine."
TV repair during lockdown has been pretty easy.
It’s mostly remote work.
Air conditioner technicians...
love to vent about their job in order to cool off.
I once convinced my younger brother to swallow a small lamp.
I got in so much trouble but it was worth it to see his little face light up.
What's the first tea that comes in a teapot?
empytea
What do you call a regular potato broadcasting sports?
A common tater.
What football team do energy providers root for the most?
The Chargers.
Don't ever change a light bulb while the oven is on
You'll get burned out
What do you call a Smart TV?
In-telly-gent.
What do you call laundry detergent on the top shelf?
High tide.
An electrician needed to change 8 fluorescent lamps to brighten up a large conference room at our office. I asked him if he needed a hand carrying them.
He said no, this is light.
Go to BabaMail
