Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office?
He was the first Porkmaster General.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
Why do pigs make awful football players?
They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
Why couldn’t the pig tie his shoelaces? He was too ham-fisted.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
What did one pig say to the other?
Let’s be pen pals.
What happened when the pig pen broke?
They had to use the pig pencil.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug?
Pulled pork!
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.