Why did the pig go into the kitchen? He felt like bacon.
Black background, brown background, black background, brown background, black background, brown background.
What was the most popular kids' movie in Ancient Greece?
Troy Story.
What is the capital of Greece?
G.
What do you call an ant from overseas?
Import-ant.
I had a few doubts about buying a big metal cabinet to store all my valuables.
Turns out... it was a safe purchase.
What’s a llama’s favorite drink?
Llamanade.
Why do ghosts like elevators? They raise their spirits.
What do dog scientists to with their bones?
They barium.
What does goblin's blood consist of?
Hemogoblin.
My professor accused me of plagiarizing.
His words, not mine.
What did one cloud of fog say to the other?
I don’t know. It’s a mistery.
The weather outside is snow joke.
How does a bee get to school?
She takes a school buzz
Why shouldn't you buy illegal seasonings? It's always a shady dill.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Which vegetable is most likely to be your friend?
The broccoli.
What happened when 100 hares got loose on Main Street? The police had to comb the area.
Why does a microwave hum?
Because it doesn't know the words
Why did Jesus ask Judas to crave the turkey?
Beause he knows he likes stabbing others in the back.
If Kim Jong-un had a private yacht, it would be a dictator ship
How does Moses make coffee?
Hebrews it.
What a pun's dream job?
To be an acu-pun-cturist!
I like you a latte.
What is a beaver's most favorite song ever? You made me a, you made me a beaver, beaver.
Don’t worry, beer happy.
What do you call a group of cows that are on top of a hill? High steaks.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!
What did the mother bread tell her baby roll? You really are the apple of my rye.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
What do you call a Minotaur in a playground?
A swing and a myth.
I was talking to my Mom the other day and she mentioned that none of her sisters needed the vaccine.
Turned out they already had the auntybodies.
It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25. You know why?
Inflation.
Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness?
He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.
Why don’t fish play basketball?
Because they're afraid of the net.
Despite his puns being so orange-inal, nobody really likes them.
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.
I only believe in 12.5% of everything the Bible says.
Which makes me an eighth theist.
Are you a taco?
Cause you sure taco lot
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
What do you call a flower with a mouth?
Tulip.
"There's no bunny like you."
Toilet jokes aren’t my favorite...
But they’re a solid number 2.
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
Do you know why the beaver was found guilty?
Because the prosecutor had damming evidence.
Someone stole my fragrance-free lotion...
It was a scentless act of cruelty.
Where do elves go to get famous?
Holly-wood.
The big play is in seven days, you better work on your peach enhancement techniques.