As long as your dog sticks by your side.
Anything is paw-sible.
Why did the Dalmatian have to go to the eye doctor?
He kept seeing spots.
What is a dog’s favorite dessert?
Pupcakes.
My dog is very poor.
He can’t afford a “woof” over his head.
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
How do you keep a dog from smelling?
You hold its nose.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What is a dog’s favorite pick-up line?
You must be my backyard… because I dig you
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
What was the puppy's costume for Halloween?
The Big Bad Woof.
What do a tree and a bog dog have in common?
They both have a lot of bark.
What do dogs have that no other animal has?
Puppies.
Why was the dog such a good storyteller?
Because he knew how to paws for dramatic effect.
What is a dog’s favorite pizza topping?
Pup-peroni.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
What do dogs say when something cool happens?
Paw-some.
What is a dog’s ideal job?
A barkeologist.
What do you call a cold dog?
A pup-sicle. Better steer clear, especially if he’s fur-ocious… don’t want him to give you frost-bite.
My dog never stands up for himself.
He just rolls over.
What do you get when you cross a Sheepdog with a jelly?
The collie wobbles.
He’s not a bad dog.
He’s just a little ruff around the edges.
Why did the dog go to university? To get a pe-digree.
Why did the firefighters bring a dog along with them?
To help them find the nearest fire hydrant.
What did the dog say when he had a bad day?
Today has been ruff.
What was the dog’s favorite book?
Winnie the Pooch. He loves to read a lot of story tails before bed.
Why did the snowman name his dog ‘Frost’?
Because ‘Frost’ bites.
What did the puppy say to his mum?
I woof you.
What makes more noise than a dog barking outside your window?
Two dogs barking outside your window.
My dog loves Star Wars.
His favorite character is Chew-bark-a.
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
Why are Dalmatians so bad at hiding?
Because they are always spotted.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
What type of dog doesn’t bark?
A hush puppy.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
What is a dog’s favorite type of homework?
A lab report.
What did the Golden Retriever say to the beautiful poodle?
You’re looking very fetching.
I nearly kicked my dog out, but we renegotiated the terms of his leash.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
What did the dog say when he sat down on sand paper?
Rough.
What do dogs eat for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
What happens when you cross an Australian dog and a Beatle?
Dingo Starr.
What is a dog’s favorite brand of whiskey?
Jack Spaniels.
Why was the skeleton afraid of the dog?
Because dogs love bones.
What breed of dog will laugh at any joke?
A Chi-ha-ha
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
How do you stop your dog from barking in your front yard?
Put him in your backyard.
My dog’s favorite band is The Beagles.
What do you call a dog who can fight?
A Boxer.
Have you ever heard of Pavlov’s dog?
Yeah, he rings a bell