Why did the dog go to university? To get a pe-digree.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
What do dogs and Santa have in common?
They are both seen Dachshund through the snow.
When is the best time to paint a dog?
When they're asleep.
What is a dog’s favorite movie series?
Fifty shades of Greyhound.
Where do dogs go after the their tails fall off?
The re-tail store.
What happens when you buy a dog from the blacksmith?
When he gets home he’ll make a bolt for the door.
I nearly kicked my dog out, but we renegotiated the terms of his leash.
What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?
A bud hound.
Why was the skeleton afraid of the dog?
Because dogs love bones.
What happens when you cross an Australian dog and a Beatle?
Dingo Starr.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
What is a dog’s favorite vegetable? A collie flower.
How do fleas get from place to place?
By itch-hiking.
What did the dog groomer say to her dentist?
I clean my canines every day.
What type of dog can use a phone?
A dial-matian.
My dog loves poetry.
Especially William Shakes-paw.
Why did the firefighters bring a dog along with them?
To help them find the nearest fire hydrant.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
What is a dog’s favorite pizza topping?
Pup-peroni.
My dog recently joined a gang. Now he’s all about that pug-life.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
How do you keep a dog from smelling?
You hold its nose.
What is the poshest breed of dog?
A Cavalier King Charles Spaniel.
Why did the snowman name his dog ‘Frost’?
Because ‘Frost’ bites.
What happened to the dog who ate too much garlic?
Its bark was worse than its bite.
What does a dog love to eat while watching a movie?
Pupcorn.