What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elka Seltzer.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.