Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
How do tigers like their cheese?
Grrrrreated
When you cross a wolf and Fred Astaire, you get dances with wolves.
Never take a flamingo to the local swimming baths. They really don’t like claw-rine.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.
How can you tell when a polar bear is moving?
There’s a “fur sale” sign in the yard.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
What's a frog's favorite game?
Hop-scotch (or leapfrog).
The Easter Bunny won’t be making his usual rounds this year. He’s laid up with a hareline fracture.
Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
Young goats should be careful when they're out and and about and shouldn't jump into a stranger's car.
That's how you get kidnapped.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
What do sloths throw in winter? Slowballs.
When does a turkey go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a plane?
A Boeing constrictor.
A woman bought a rooster, wanting to hear it crow.
However, it turns out the rooster was mute, so she was out of cluck.
Where does the Easter bunny get his eggs? From an eggplant.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
Which flower is known as the most ferocious flower? A tiger lily.
What did one beached whale say to the other beached whale?
Long time no sea.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do stylish frogs wear?
Jumpsuits.
What type of food do worms like?
Your Halloween Candy!
Where do beavers sleep? They sleep on a river bed.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
What planet does a seal live on?
EARFFF EARFFF EARFFFF.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
Goat milk?
Why did the otter cross the river?
To get to the otter side
Do you know what kind of stock to use when making neotropical near-passerine bird soup?
Doesnt matter, as long as you put Toucans in.
Our flamingo colleague was leaving for a new job recently. We all told him to flamingo for it.
What do you call monkeys who share an Amazon account?
Prime mates.
What were the ponies most excited for in the meal?
The main horse.
My Roomba accidentally rolled out of my front door, and the neighborhood squirrels and rabbits immediately started attacking it.
Nature abhors a vacuum.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
What’s the difference between a lion and a tiger?
A tiger always tells the truth, the other one is always lie-on.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What did the dog say to its fleas?
Stop bugging me
How do you upset a dinosaur? Touchasaurus Spot.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed ? Find somewhere else to sleep!
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
Which fish is the most famous? The starfish.
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
What did the worm say to the other when he was late home? Where in earth have you been.
What do you call a group of whale musicians?
An orca-stra.