Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive.
Olive, who?
Olive you, and I don’t care who knows it!
I love you with all my butt.
I would say my heart, but it is just not as big. (wink wink where my curvy booties at?!)
What do German meat lovers breathe?
Hamburg-air
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
I love you and I ain’t lion.
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One thing you never want to do is divorce a butcher.
That would be a huge missed steak.
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
What do you say when you find the perfect font?
You’re just my type!
What did the astronaut’s fiancé say when he proposed to her in open outer space? She said, “I can’t breathe!”
I took a road trip with my girlfriend who finally confessed she needs to stop and hug every now and again to reduce anxiety.
It was touch and go from there on.
Never has there been a more romantic story than how those two geologists met.
It was lava at first sight.
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
"Did you hear how the baker proposed to his girlfriend?"
"Yeah, he told her he loafed her more than life itself"
"No, he actually told her how much he kneaded her"
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
When you’re smooching with your honey, and your nose is kinda runny, you may think it’s kinda funny, but it snot.
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
What is a cat lover's favourite tree?
A juni-purr.
I get a real kick out of you.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
You met all of my koala-fications
You’re right up my alley.
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
You know, I didn't kiss my wife until I was married...
because she wasn't my wife until we were married.
What do you call a person who illegally delivers hugs from country to country?
An international snuggler
You are just like my car because you drive me crazy.
I pitcher us together forever.
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
Your love is like vodka.
You were worth the chase.
I always have a ball with you.
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
You are like my asthma.
You just take my breath away.
From one vegan to another – I think you’re fern-tastic, and I’ll never leaf you baby.
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
What did one leaf say to the other leaf?
I’ve fallen for you.
What do you call someone that's hungry for some cuddles?
Hugry.
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
What is it called when two spies hug?
A bond-ing moment.
Why is it always easy for vampires to find their better halves?
Because it’s always love at first bite.
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