I have bean
thinking about you.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes
So she gave me a hug!!!
Your love is like vodka.
You were worth the chase.
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
Sorry if this is extra cheesy, but you have a pizza my heart.
I whale always love you.
What did the koala say to his girlfriend?
I love you-calpytus.
You met all of my koala-fications
"I think you should embrace the change, son"
Said my father as he handed me a handful of coins.
Never laugh at your spouse’s choice… You’re one of them.
My wife and were on the sofa and I lean in for a cuddle.
She says: "careful I'm holding a tea!"
And I say: "and I'm holding you, so I guess we're both holding letters of the alphabet"
What is it called when two spies hug?
A bond-ing moment.
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
"You bake me crazy."
I loaf you a lot.
Let’s go to bread.
I'm reading a romance book in Braille.
I don't think I'll finish. It's too touchy feely for me.
What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover?
I want hue
Did you hear Harry’s girlfriend left him for Keith?
Yeah, she was always telling the poor guy to Harry up, turns out she found someone who could Keith better.
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One thing you never want to do is divorce a butcher.
That would be a huge missed steak.
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
How do you kiss someone at the end of the world?
On the apoca-lips.
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
What did one sushi roll say to the other sushi roll?
I’m soy into you.
You're my purr-son.
I cannoli be happy
What’s it like to kiss a vampire?
A real pain in the neck!
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
We make a great pear
I love all my computer brands and sometimes give ’em smooches.
But I never kiss Intel.
Being uncomfortable with any physical contact, I decided to rent the book “How to Hug” from the library.
Turns out it was Volume 6 of an old encyclopedia.
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