I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
How do flowers kiss?
With their tulips
You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body.
In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
"I think you should embrace the change, son"
Said my father as he handed me a handful of coins.
Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and feel glad you are alive?
I just did and apparently I will not be allowed on this airline again!
Why were the melon lovers sad?
Because they cantaloupe.
You are like my dentures.
I cannot smile without you.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll
Did you hear Harry’s girlfriend left him for Keith?
Yeah, she was always telling the poor guy to Harry up, turns out she found someone who could Keith better.
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
Do you have a date for Valentine’s Day?
Yes, it is February 14th
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover?
I want hue
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
From one vegan to another – I think you’re fern-tastic, and I’ll never leaf you baby.
Why did Larry the lizard leave his lover longing?
he had ... a reptile dysfunction
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
Whenever two vegetarians fall in love, you know that’s going to be a great pear. Now lettuce celebrate, because we all love vegetables.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
What did one sushi roll say to the other sushi roll?
I’m soy into you.
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
I have bean thinking about you.
I love you and I ain’t lion.
There might be other fish in the sea, but you’re my sole mate
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
While cuddling my girlfriend, I whispered "Honey, this isn't working out for me."
Then I rolled off the bed and started doing push-ups. "This is working out for me!"
I always have a souper time with you.
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
What did one leaf say to the other leaf?
I’ve fallen for you.
You know, I didn't kiss my wife until I was married...
because she wasn't my wife until we were married.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
Never has there been a more romantic story than how those two geologists met.
It was lava at first sight.
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
What is it called when two spies hug?
A bond-ing moment.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
There were two antennas who met on a roof and they fell in love and decided to get married. The ceremony was nothing fancy, but you could tell that they had a very strong connection.
I get a real kick out of you.
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