My wife got a straw for her drink...
When she sat down, she took a sip, and frustratedly sighed "My straw has a hole in it!"
I replied "I should hope it has two!"
Mark Knopfler is opening a Chinese restaurant
He's calling it Wok of Life.
I have a phobia of using the wrong amounts of ingredients when I’m cooking
So I’ve been taking measures to deal with it.
My husband Ronnald asked me what do monkeys wear when cooking.
I said, "an aperon".
I was boiling vegetables in the saucepan the other day when my wife went to move it...
I said careful, it’s got a leek in it.
I said to her, are going to eat that whole plate of spaghetti??
She said: no, it's in pasta bowl
What do you call a knife that cuts 4 loaves of Irish bread at once?
A four loaf cleaver!
Lost my bread knife the other day..
I'm absolutely gutted...we've been through thick and thin
Almost dropped a plate of Alphabeti Spaghetti. That could have spelled disaster.
It’s amazing how most jars look alike...
The resemblance is uncanny
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