Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
Dublin over in laughter.
I’m a small Irish creature who has been diagnosed with a serious sickness. It’s Leprechronic.
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.
St. Patrick’s is all about the pursuit of hoppiness!
Jameson on St. Patrick’s Day? It’s worth a shot.
What's Irish and stays out all night?
Paddy O'Furniture.
What do you call a fake Irish stone?
A shamrock.
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
When does a leprechaun cross the road?
Just like everyone - when it's green!
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
Are people jealous of the Irish?
Yeah, they’re green with envy.
In Ireland, when the cows are in the road it’s udder chaos.
Don’t worry, Moher pictures are coming.
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
What do you call a big Irish spider?
A Paddy long legs.
I love when you coddle me.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
Irish cuisine is stew-pendous.
You’re my lucky charm.
My grandma is 80% Irish.
People call her Iris.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
Did you hear about the Irish potato that immigrated?
He became a French fry.
Ireland is pitcher perfect.
Just look, it’s the Trifle Tower
March 17 is near, and I am so excited about it. The clover it gets, the more excited I become.
In Ireland, I call the shots.
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
Irish potatoes are spud-tacular.
Why did the two Irish men fight amongst themselves?
They can’t find any other worthy opponents.
Do you be-leaf in magic?
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
How can Irish people tell when it’s summer?
The rain gets warmer.
Did you hear Ireland is the fastest-growing country in Europe?
Its population is always Dublin.
What is it called when two Irish couples go out on a date?
Dublin.
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
In Ireland, they really like to ham it up.
I’m ready to shamrock and roll.
What do you call a bulletproof Irish man?
Rick O’Shay.
I am happy that the arrangements for St Patrick's day are going great. The large bottles of green soda look pitcher-perfect.
Ireland is a little lamb-boyant.
How can you tell if you’ve told a really funny Irish joke?
People will be Dublin over with laughter!
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
Ireland always leaves me wanting Moher.
Irish food is legen-dairy.
Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
When I went to my favorite Irish cafe after years, I felt deja brew all over again.
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
What kind of spells do leprechauns use?
Lucky Charms!
Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaved clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.
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