What did one mole say to the other?
We have great chemistry together.
A chemistry lab is like a big party.
Some drop the acid while others drop the base.
I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.
What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
Sorry, that was my fault.
Oxygen went on a date with potassium last night.
It went OK.
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
What do you call an acid with attitude?
A meano-acid.
I like looking at a chart of all the chemical elements... periodically.
What kind of test do chemistry students like best?
Mole-tiple choice
Did you check the news? There was a Radon the chemical store.
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?
Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.
How do you make a hormone? You don't pay her.
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
I keep making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.
Why couldn't the alpha helix say the alphabet?
Because it broke up every time it got to L-amino P.
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"
The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
If Iron Man and the Silver Surfer teamed up together, would they be alloys?
How did the blond define hydrophobic on her chemistry exam? Fear of utility bills.
How would you describe a stinky chemist?
Mole-odorous
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
When Miss Acid told her husband, Mr Alkali, she was pregnant...
He exploded with anger.
It wasn't the reaction she was hoping for.
Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.
When life gives you mold - make penicillin.
What are mammoles?
Four-legged ani-moles
How rich is Avogadro?
He's a multi-mole-ionaire.
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