What happens if you break the brain scanner?
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
What do you call a skull without 86 billion neurons?
A no brainer.
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
What do you get when you cross a "bad idea for using fur" with 86 billion neurons?
A hare-brained idea.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and opera?
Because they are very cultured.
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
When does it rain brains?
During a brain storm.
I had a dream I was looking for my brain
But it was all in my head.
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
Where does a neuron keep its money?
In a brain bank.
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
Why do action potentials make good volleyball players?
They are always spiking.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
Where are neurons put in jail when they commit a crime?
A nerve cell.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
How did the woman react when the doctor suggested she have a brain biopsy?
She gave him a piece of her mind.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
What is the best toothpaste for the brain?
Neural crest.
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
Go to BabaMail
