Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
What did the brain say after it got an electrical shock?
"This was a stimulating experience."
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
Where do brains go for vacation in Massachusetts?
Braintree, MA
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
What do you call a hat for the brain?
A thinking cap.
Where does a neuron keep its money?
In a brain bank.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
What did the mother brain say to her oldest child when it was bothering her youngest child?
It didn't want to get brain-washed.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
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