An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
What is a sleeping brain's favorite musical group (rock band)?
REM.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
What did the axon terminal say to the receptor when they broke up?
I need my space.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
How do you decide whether to be a Brain Surgeon or a Novelist?
You flip a coin. It’ll land on heads or tales.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
How did the woman react when the doctor suggested she have a brain biopsy?
She gave him a piece of her mind.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
What did the brain say after it got an electrical shock?
"This was a stimulating experience."
When does it rain brains?
During a brain storm.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
What do you call a hat for the brain?
A thinking cap.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and opera?
Because they are very cultured.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
What do you call glia when it is happy?
Smyelin.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
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