Birthday candles don’t exercise because they burn out too quickly!
More candles means a bigger wish!
I don't get why a kid in my son's Pre-K class gave everyone an inflatable sword as a party favor for their birthday.
It's pointless.
You’re not 50 years old, you are 20 years old with 30 years of experience!
Why do pieces of popcorn always have great birthdays? Because they’re always popping!
Nobody showed up to my 16th birthday party,
I congratulated him on his win against Polyphemus and we started the party.
I know birthdays get worse as you get older. But look at the bright side — not too many left now.
I gifted my girlfriend a star for her birthday
I think its perfect, she said she needed some space.
I keep telling my wife I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.
You are one candle closer to starting a house fire.
For the record, you’re not old, you’re a classic.
What did the boy without hands get for his birthday?
Nobody knows, he hasn't got the package open yet.
They say everything gets better with age.
Got a universal remote for my Birthday.
Well, this changes everything.
How do pickles celebrate their birthdays? They relish them.
“Dad, why do you always wrap my birthday gifts in this weird fabric?”
Dad: I just wanted to.... make my presents felt.
I just bought my friend a mini fridge for his birthday
I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
My wife isn't talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday....
I don't know how I did that... I didn't even know it was her birthday!
I’m a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving me legos for my birthday.
I don’t know what to make of it.
You know you are getting older when the candles don’t fit on the cake.
Behind every great parent is a great kid. Happy birthday!
Remember the one about people queuing up for drinks at Old Faithful's birthday party?
You're not missing much; the punch line blows.
Hey shawty, it’s sherbert day.
You feta have a gouda birthday.
The girls next door gave me a Rolex for my birthday.
But I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch.
I handed my dad a calculator for his birthday. with a dissapointed scowl on his face, he asked me: "Wheres the pi?"
Happy birthday to someone old enough to go vintage shopping in their own closet.
People keep getting me clocks for my birthday.
Time and time again.
Does a green candle burn longer than a pink candle? No they both burn shorter.
My girlfriend made me one of those sculpted 3D cakes for my birthday but wouldn't stop reminding me how it took her all day to decorate it..
..which is surprising since to me it looked like a piece of cake.
You are aged to perfection.
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m having a hard time dealing with it.
Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about
the present, I didn’t get you one.
You did a grape job raisin me. Happy birthday!
For my wife's birthday, I bought her some beads for her abacus
It's the little things that count.
People keep getting me clocks for my birthday.
Time and time again.
For my girlfriend's birthday I got her a dwarfish clown who told jokes...
It wasn't a great gift, but she appreciated the jester.
I’m a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving me legos for my birthday.
I don’t know what to make of it.
Looking 50 is great! If you’re 60.
My wife isn't talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday....
I don't know how I did that... I didn't even know it was her birthday!
I gifted my girlfriend a star for her birthday
I think its perfect, she said she needed some space.
Go to BabaMail
