What goes up but never comes down? Your age!
It was my wife's birthday the other day
I took her to an orchard and we stood there for 20 minutes.
Apparently it wasn't the Apple watch she wanted.
I handed my dad a calculator for his birthday. with a dissapointed scowl on his face, he asked me: "Wheres the pi?"
What did the Teddy Bear say after blowing out his birthday candles? No cake for me…I’m stuffed
You are aged to perfection.
My dad got me a clone of myself for my birthday...
He said “Here, it’s faux you!”
“Dad, why do you always wrap my birthday gifts in this weird fabric?”
Dad: I just wanted to.... make my presents felt.
You feta have a gouda birthday.
My wife isn't talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday....
I don't know how I did that... I didn't even know it was her birthday!
I keep telling my wife I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.
More candles means a bigger wish!
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