How do worms measure their length?
They ask a tape worm to help out!
A worm child comes home. It sees mom and asks: "Mom, have you seen dad?"
Mom says: "Dad went fishing with the guys."
Why did the worm cross the playground?
To get to the underground slide!
I love eating glow worms
Especially as a light snack
Did you hear about the two silkworms that were in a race? They wound up in a tie.
Why are glow worms good to carry in your Halloween bag?
They can lighten your load!
What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant? Very big worm holes in your garden.
What makes a glow worm glow?
A light meal!
What did one glow worm said to the other one?
You glow girl!
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?
It ended in a tie.
How do you know you have a tape worm?
It’s comming out of your belly!
What did the maggot say to another?
What's a nice maggot like you doing in a joint like this?
When fishing, is there ever a good reason to take the worm off the hook?
I guess that’s debaitable.
What eats laptops? Computer worms.
How do you make a glow worm happy?
Cut off his tail, he’ll be de-lighted!
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
I felt so guilty after I stepped on that worm this morning. You should have seen it, it looked genuinely crushed.
What's invisible and smells like worms?
Bird farts.
What’s a glow worms favourite song?
Wake me up before you glow glow!
When should you stop for a glow worm? When he has a red light.
What’s the difference between a worm and pumpkin?
Have you ever tried worm pie?
What do you call it when worms take over the world? Global Worming.
What do worms leave round their baths? The scum of the earth.
What is the maggot army called? The Apple Corps.
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat?
A dirty kid!
Why was the scarecrow upset with the worm?
It was going ear to ear in the corn field!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with some beer?
Light ale!
Why do worms have trouble getting up in the morning? Because the early bird catches the worm.
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python? A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death.
What kind of computer does a worm have? A Macintosh.
What was the worm doing in the cornfield?
He was going in one ear and out the other!
What did the worm say to the other when he was late home? Where in earth have you been.
How do you make a glow worm happy? Cut off his tail, he'll be de-lighted.
What happens when fish start an addiction to worms?
They get hooked.
Why did the worm leave the Apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs
Hit the hammer that judges have and says “worm court is in session”. Then says
“All writhe”
What do you call it when evil worms take over the world?
Global Worming!
How many worms does it take to eat a zombie?
It depends on the size of the zombie!
Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag? They can lighten your load.
Why didn't the two worms get on Noah's Ark in an apple? Because everyone had to go on in pairs.
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? A dirty kid.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.
Why do worms taste like chewing gum?
Because they’re wrigleys!
Why are worms so easy to get along with?
Because they are always down to Earth.
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
What does a bookworm do during a baseball game? Worm the bench.
Why is earth worm humor offensive?
They only know dirty jokes.
What do you call two worms in love?
Soilmates.
How do you make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail and it will be de-lighted.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tell it a funny Halloween joke and see which end laughs!