Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
Where do horses get their weaves from?
Mane.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
What were the ponies most excited for in the meal?
The main horse.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.