What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What do you call a horse that lives next door to you?
A neigh-bor.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What did the guard say to stop the horse from escaping?
Halt-her!
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.