How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
Where do gorillas go to after work?
The monkey bars.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Why did the Gorilla fail its exam? He didn't have the ape-titude.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What is a gorillas favourite ice cream flavour.
Chocolate chimp.
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots