My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
What did the Gorilla say when he saw there was a sale happening?
Ooh! OOh! OOOh!!!!
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
Did you hear about the extremely serious gorilla?
He didn't monkey around.
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
Q. What haapens if a gorilla sits on your piano?
A. You get a flat note.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Where do gorillas go to after work?
The monkey bars.