There are good and bad times to buy a flamingo. Bad times are when they’re expensive, the best times are when they’re cheep.
I have a flamingo friend who has a fantastic imagination, but they are always indulging in flights of fancy.
What do you call a flamingo that flew into a wall?
A flamingstop.
Have you heard about the new book all about flamingos? Apparently it’s flying off the shelves.
Flamingos are pretty good at ideas… They have a lot of experience with formation.
How do pink birds make friends? They fla-mingle.
Flamingoes have a special name for one of their numbers who has passed away. They call it flamingone.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
I had a flamingo come to stay with me when he had a cold. We nicknamed him phlegmingo.
What soccer position does a pink flamingo play? Flamingoalie.
When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo,
I had to put my foot down.
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
I do find that flamingos don’t plan very well for the future… They’re too prone to putting all their eggs in the one basket.
Flamingos are great at surfing the internet. I think it’s because they have webbed feet.
I came across an injured flamingo the other day. I tried to help, but luckily it was already receiving medical tweetment.
Flamingos are great to go out with, because they all party like flock stars.
Our flamingo colleague was leaving for a new job recently. We all told him to flamingo for it.
What is a flamingo's favorite thing to do at the weekend? Play fla-bingo.
Baby flamingos really are badly behaved. I think it’s because their parents never put their foot down.
I once tried crossing a flamingo with a cement mixer. Sounds crazy, but I really wanted a good brick layer.
What is the opposite of a flamingo? The answer is, a flaminstop.
Never trust a flamingo unless you can be sure it has fully fledged ideas.
Why do flamingos make bad pets? They are too much of a birden.
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
There’s a new dish out; it’s a cross between a cake and a bird. They call it a Flan-ingo.
Never take a flamingo to the local swimming baths. They really don’t like claw-rine.
There was a flamingo in our garden for such a long time, we started calling it a flaminstay.
I wondered why flamingos were so strong, so I did a little research. Turns out they do a lot of eggs-er-cise.
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
I do wonder why my flamingo friends always do so well in tests and exams. After all, they always just wing it.
Why do flamingos fly south in winter? Because it would be too far to walk.
It’s pretty easy to choose your favorite type of bird
Flamingos have a leg up on all the rest.
Why are flamingos the happiest birds? They live with no reggrets.
My pink bird friend got dumped a while ago. He was sad for a while, but now he’s singe and ready to flamingle.
Have you ever wondered which part of the flamingo has the most feathers? I found out once – turns out it’s the outside.
What is a pink bird's favorite kind of dance? Flamenco.
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
A flamingo only ever asks for a plaster when it hurts its pinky.
Why couldn't anyone see the flamingo? It was in de skies.
My flamingo friends are always making me pay for dinner. I find that they can be real cheepskates.
Flamingos can get away with the most outrageous behaviour and you’d never know that they were embarrassed. This is because you can never tell when they are blushing.
Some pink birds can be really rude. I approached a group of them the other day and they screamed “Flamingo away!”
How do officials start the races at the pink bird olympics? They say three... two... one... flaminGO!
It’s really easy to send a nice card to a flamingo. You just write “Hope you have a flamingood…”
What is a pink bird's favorite dance? Flamin-tango.
Flight allows flamingos to stay safe from predators. This is natural selection in action, and explains why flaminstays are extinct.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
Flamingos are pretty daring birds. They like just about anything, as long as it’s eggs-citing.
Flamingos can be a bit of a daring bunch. In fact, they always fly by the seat of their pants.
Have you ever tried crossing a lion with a flamingo? It will be pink, that’s the mane thing.