What is a dog’s favorite pick-up line?
You must be my backyard… because I dig you
What do you call a dog who can fight?
A Boxer.
What do you call someone who always takes pictures of their dog?
A pup-arazzi.
Why was the skeleton afraid of the dog?
Because dogs love bones.
How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
Konnichihuahua.
The hotel said NO DOGS ALLOWED.
I guess it was a little too paw-sh.
Who was the greatest dog detective?
Sherlock Bones.
What do you get when you cross a Sheepdog with a jelly?
The collie wobbles.
What did Shakespeare say when he was angry with his Dalmatian?
Out, out, damned spot.
My dog loves poetry.
Especially William Shakes-paw.
How do you stop your dog from barking in your front yard?
Put him in your backyard.
Why do dogs find it hard to work the TV remote?
Because they always hit the paws button.
My dog takes so long to get ready. He can never chews what to wear.
My dog hates the rain.
He doesn’t want to step in a poodle.
What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator?
A friend you can count on.
Did you hear the story about a Golden Retriever who brought a ball back from miles away?
It was far-fetched.
What do you call someone who loves dogs?
A pug addict.
He’s not a bad dog.
He’s just a little ruff around the edges.
What type of dog can use a phone?
A dial-matian.
Sorry we missed puppy class.
My dog was wagging. There goes his oppawtunity for pawfect attendance…
What was the dog’s favorite book?
Winnie the Pooch. He loves to read a lot of story tails before bed.
My dog won’t get off the PlayStation He’s been playing Fi-fur all day.
As long as your dog sticks by your side.
Anything is paw-sible.
What type of dog doesn’t bark?
A hush puppy.
What do you call dogs that look exactly the same?
Dogglegangers.
What did the dog order at a restaurant?
His owner’s homework.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
Why did the police dog get promoted?
Because he was the scenter of so many drug arrests.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
What type of dog chases anything red?
A bull dog.
Dog to Waiter: Are there any bones in this?
Waiter to Dog: Yes sir, why’s that?
Dog to Waiter: Because I really dig them!
What dog does Dracula own?
A blood-hound.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
What is a dog’s favorite brand of whiskey?
Jack Spaniels.
What do you call a dog that sneezes?
Achoo-huahua.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
What is a dog’s favorite vegetable? A collie flower.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
What do a tree and a bog dog have in common?
They both have a lot of bark.
What was Muhammad Ali’s favorite breed of dog?
A boxer.
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
What do you do when your dog chews a dictionary?
Take the words out of his mouth.
What do you call a sad pup?
A mellon collie
My dog loves Star Wars.
His favorite character is Chew-bark-a.
My dog loves designer hand-bags.
So I got him a Poochi.
What did the puppy say to his mum?
I woof you.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
My dog’s favorite band is The Beagles.