What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. What do you call the stench that comes from antlered roadkill?
A. A foul o-deer.
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
Q. Which kind of deer has a serious drinking problem?
A. The elk-oholic.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elka Seltzer.
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
What did the deer say to his friend during their night in the woods?
This is so much fawn!
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.