Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
Did Rudolph go to school?
No, he was elf taught!
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
Q. How do the doe and stag open the entry to their vacation cabin in the woods?
A. They just turn the deer knob.
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
Q. Which game do hunters go after first?
A. The nearest and the deerest.
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
Q. What do you call the stench that comes from antlered roadkill?
A. A foul o-deer.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.