What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Q. Which kind of deer has a serious drinking problem?
A. The elk-oholic.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Q. How do the doe and stag open the entry to their vacation cabin in the woods?
A. They just turn the deer knob.
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.