Crocodile Puns

These alligator puns will croc your world.

Crocodile Puns

What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a crocodile.
A funeral.
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
I like you, you croc my world.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
What came first, the alligator or the crocodile?
The dinosaur.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
What do you get if you put an alligator in a blender?
Gatorade.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
If you need to share out your to-do list, just be a dele-gator.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.