What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
What came first, the alligator or the crocodile?
The dinosaur.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
What do you get if you put an alligator in a blender?
Gatorade.
What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
If you need to share out your to-do list, just be a dele-gator.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
Why was the crocodile invited to glamorous parties?
Because she was a snappy dresser.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
What is a crocodiles favourite dessert?
Brandy snaps.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.