Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
Why doesn’t Sweden export its cattle?
It wants to keep its Stockholm.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
The reason you will see all the cows lie down when it starts to rain is because they want to keep each
udder dry.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
I warned farmer Brown not to pamper that cow too much because it would wind up giving spoiled milk.
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
What would you hear at a cow concert?
Moo-sic.
The story of the chicken and cow running away together sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalfeinated.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
Why did the mother cow give the sleepy baby cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay.
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97
So he rounded them up.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.